rlbourges

Persistent, recurring*

In Animals, Artists, Current reading, Hautvoir, Local projects, Music, Poetry, proto drafts on June 18, 2016 at 9:13 am

*themes, that is.

When did this particular theme first appear? In dreams, then in attempts at fiction – scenes, short stories, unfinished longer pieces. I can’t recall. At any rate, it’s back again and insisting on getting it’s share of story time.

For the theme to be so persistent, it must link back to something quite ancient in my personal pre-historical period. I have some ideas about that personal link. Sharing them doesn’t strike me as the best way to feed – and transform – the story.

Last Wednesday, during a coaching session, a small boy asked me if he could draw while we talked “because it’s easier to talk that way”. I said yes, of course. I had just read him a poem about a goldfish with pimples from the measles, hiding under a sponge in the fishbowl. In the poem, a small boy said he knew about the pimples but didn’t tell anybody. Why? Because he liked to hide his wad of chewing gum under the fishbowl. The boy loved the poem so much he even stopped crying. He drew the measly pimply goldfish, the bowl and the wad of gum while talking about his family woes – the tale of which is a confidential issue on which I’m sworn to secrecy.

One source of the crucial need for fictional accounts may be all the times people swear one another to secrecy.  Leaving them the choice of sharing the secret, one person at a time. Or shouting it out in bouts of Tell All. Or of inventing genetically-engineered versions of truths in need of sharing – versions that protect the basic confidentiality agreement, while letting the truth out to breathe a little. Truth has a hard enough time of it – if you can’t air it out in fiction, what recourses are left to the poor thing? To hide its pimples between a piece of sponge and a wad of chewing gum?

***

Leaving this afternoon to sing with the group. Returning tomorrow.

Meanwhile, the rain raineth and raineth, then raineth some more.

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