The Final Shove Off the Cliff

In Animals, Current reading, Drafts, Hautvoir, Local projects, Sanford Meisner on April 21, 2014 at 7:08 am

Story-wise, life-wise: same place. The place where the mother’s exhausted but the baby isn’t born yet. There’s more pushing to do, but where’s the energy for it?

On the sideboard, behind the dreamer’s head: rabbits, first one, then more. Some wild, some tame, brought in by hunters. Some quite dead, some not. The ones still breathing: ugly, without a single cute and fuzzy Easter-bunny feature. Big, brownish-grey bruisers who must have put up a fight, with teeth unrelated to those of rabbits or hares. More like the needle-sharp ones of predator fish such as pike.

Last night, the umpteenth read-through of the draft failed to ignite anything except the certainty I wasn’t there yet – wherever there will turn out to be.

I read, and read some more. The missing link. In all these words, whether spoken or held back, which ones will make the whole damn sum of work more than just another way to while away the time.

Listen. Good god, because I haven’t listened enough?

No consolation prizes for good behavior. None. That’s one possible way to fall off the wheel.

Or, in all of the murk the past left behind, a glimmer of something worth all the work. Something to salvage yet,  before the ants gobble up the whole picnic.


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